Life can sometimes feel as though it will last forever. The problem with feeling as though life may never end is that you may wake up one day realizing you’re ‘X’ (insert age) years old and perhaps don’t have the career you dreamt of, the marriage (or relationship) that you wanted, or the life that you imagined.
What to do when you find yourselves in such place?
I’ve found that one of the best things you can do is remember that no matter how much time you have left (whether it’s 10 or 60 years) – you can start to do what you love anytime. It’s your choice. You can change your actions, which will in return change your situation. I know this may sound difficult, but I promise you, the payoff is much greater.
Imagine waking up excited, happy, full of energy because you are doing what you love to do. Because you are living the life you want to live. Because you are spending time with people whose company you enjoy. Because you don’t feel like your life is full of “have to’s” (i.e. I have to work there because of XYZ, I have to spend time with them because of XYZ, I have to go to the party because XYZ). Now, “have to’s” are things you feel obliged to do, not that you want to do. It’s different to feel like you have to call someone back because you have a missed call than say, spend the whole weekend with someone whose company you don’t enjoy.
One of the life lessons I learned that made my life much better was get rid of the “have to’s” in my life. I still work, eat healthy food, exercise, spend time with loved ones, shower, etc. but those things don’t feel like a “have to” – I do them because I truly enjoy them. I decided to pursue a career that I love and wake up excited to work on, I only keep people in my life that are positive/supportive and loving towards me and I avoid any interaction that feels like I’m being dragged to.
This change wasn’t immediate; as they say “A journey of a thousand miles, begins with a single step.” And so it began, I started making changes in my life that made it better for me. After all, we decide what we do with our lives, right? Of course! But many people live trapped under the illusion of the “have to’s” and live their lives in ways that satisfy others. Once you realize you’re doing this, you take the steering wheel and are able to change it. No more feelings of obligation, having to do things to satisfy others, feeling trapped. Because remember, we don’t live forever. Take the first step towards your thousand mile journey today.
Much love, Abby